Tuesday, March 07, 2006
CorporateSpeak
CorporateSpeak seems to have an alarming similarity to Orwell's doublethink. I recently ran Windows Update and picked Express (I was trying out IE Tab under Firefox). I get this:
To use this latest version of Windows Update, you will need to upgrade some of its components. This version provides you with the following enhancements to our service:
Express and custom installation: Choose only the most recent critical updates or pick and choose from all available updates.
Smarter downloads: If downloading is interrupted, the process will start up where it left off the next time you download that update.
Smaller downloads: Only the files your computer needs are downloaded, saving download time and connection-speed costs.
One version: Only the most recent updates are offered to you.
Less clutter: You can now hide updates you don't want to see.
Update news: A News from Microsoft section on the Windows Update home page displays tips and the latest information.
Well, that all sounds rather bullshit-y and nebulous. There is a details button, so I push that and a section expands to show this:
Oh.
I feel all warm and snuggly now.
To use this latest version of Windows Update, you will need to upgrade some of its components. This version provides you with the following enhancements to our service:
Well, that all sounds rather bullshit-y and nebulous. There is a details button, so I push that and a section expands to show this:
Windows Genuine Advantage Validation Tool (KB892130)
710 KB , less than 1 minute
The Windows Genuine Advantage Validation Tool enables you to verify that your copy of Microsoft Windows is genuine. The tool validates your Windows installation by checking Windows Product Identification and Product Activation status.
Oh.
I feel all warm and snuggly now.